Relationships

The art of understanding your partner!

BY Vetha Sampathkumar

​Women always want men to understand and cater to their needs and desires without expressing them. They should understand that men have no extra sensory perceptions but are mere humans.
 
Men complain women for speaking too much about petty things. That's how they function. Only when she lets out, she feels relieved. Men should increase their capacity to listen to women, though they keep repeating the same. Women feel better if men listen to them without getting frustrated.
 
Men usually sit alone silently to deal with their problems. Women misunderstand this and urge men to share their confusions as they do. This causes the man to yell on her. She now doesn't know the reason for his anger, because, from her point, she has only offered him help. Women should know that, men function so, and leave them alone at those times.
 
Men hate it when women give them ideas to improve. According to them, they are perfect and only broken things need improvement. So, when a women says him tips to improve, he assumes that his woman thinks that he's completely futile. Women should stop advising men, and start encouraging them for smaller things they do.
 
If a couple travel, and the husband drives, and is confused with the path, and ends up choosing the wrong one, inspite of his wife's advise to use Google maps, and reaches the destination later than needed, his wife should not shout at him, though he's wrong. Instead, she could thank him for the quality time he gifted her, that they spent alone, after years.
 
Men do not know what really a woman needs. They wrongly assume that their women will feel happy if they buy them their favourite sarees or ornaments. Yes, they like them. But those sarees and accessories are not their atmost happiness. They want acts of love, care and words of affection far more than those sarees.
 
Again, men pre assume that acts of love include buying the costliest kurti in the shop. Not again! They may love a cheaper kurti, but if men buy them, even without his woman expressing it, she loves it, because, women love when men fulfill their desires without expressing them. Men should develop their understanding of women's desires.
 
Women feel neglected when men do not appreciate their outfits. Men usually do not concentrate on making up themselves, but  for women, they are delicate and so they keep making up with different techniques, longing for a word of appreciation from their  Men should increase their capacity to, first notice the difference in their women today and yesterday, and then appreciate his woman's beauty. 
 
Men develop ego and anger when his woman compares his valour with that of another man, be it her father or her brother. Women should start appreciating men's small acts of bravery.
 
Men and women have separate vocabularies and dictionaries. When a woman says, "The house is always dirty and I'm tired" , she actually wants her man to assist her in cleaning the house. But, what a man understands is, "You always make the home dirty and I'm tired of clearing the mess you created". 
Both should develop a clear understanding of each other's vocabularies.
 
Relationship myths are endless and sometimes comical. If a man, touches a woman emotionally, he gets access to touch her physically. A story will help understanding this.
A couple got married, both were strangers. Both were very shy that they didn't touch each other even after weeks of being together. Every day, while returning home, the man would buy her jasmine, which she loves and adorns her hair with. One day she got her menses and called him over the phone, and asked him not to buy jasmine (bleeding women, should not wear jasmines), in a gloomy voice. Understanding her inconvenience, he came home earlier. She was lying tired on the bed. He put down everything and came to her, sat silently by her side and adorned her lock with the Roses he bought, which said her softly said that, "I'm there for you". She was touched. Then he pressed her arms and feet with love and atmost affection. She was shy but she could not stop him, because she loved his warmth. Thus, they lived happily thereafter.
 
Dear men! Please learn the art of touching without your fingers.